Archive for November, 2010

Tuesday Nov 30th 2010

Posted: November 30, 2010 by Marya in Quote of the day
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Thinks some people are like sandpaper, they may rub and scratch you the wrong way, but remember who will look smooth and polished because of it  🙂

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I listened to a radio show on my way to work this morning. Every day they do a contest to win merchandise. The topic chosen? 1970’s sitcoms. The station hosts played theme music and a contestant who called in had to guess the matching television program. Of course they didn’t guess correctly and I found myself yelling at the stereo system like a raving lunatic. “WELCOME BACK KOTTER, you freakin’ toe sock smelling idiot.” Did they have a banana bike shoved up their arse blocking out their brain waves? Crap! They missed an easy win. How dare that person not be brainwashed like the rest of us.

It’s been raining like a rhino pissin’ on a flat rock which makes my arm ache. I felt so much pain at work yesterday I almost quit my job. Then I noticed I got a Christmas bonus on my pay stub. That gave me a whole new – higher – pain tollerance. Ha -ha. Luckily, I finally got the phone call I’ve been waiting for today. I’m scheduled for an MRI next Wednesday at 9PM. Murphy defying miracles do happen.

I’m willing to share some life skills with y’all. Think before you do the crass, brainless shite you do. If somebody talks to you, don’t walk away while they are still speaking. I don’t care how rushed you think you are. Don’t be such an ignorant piece of whale skitter. Will it kill you to stop for two seconds and respond instead of making the person yell so you can hear them? I swear, I think most people reach in and get their manners out of a effin’ dunce cap.

I write these blogs to share my feelings with you. After all, it’s cheaper than therapy.   If you love my blogs leave your kudo and John Doe, below.

Seriously, get out of the Cracker Jack and learn the rules of the road.

When the Crossing Guard has his stop sign out it means stop. Stop you effin’ freaks! It doesn’t mean you step on your gas, go through his stop sign or hit him with your vehicle.

If I am in my vehicle and stop to let somebody cross, it doesn’t mean you zoom around me and hit a child. I’m stopped for a reason. Use your neanderthal-laden brain.

This is how you avoid killing me and others in the morning:

1. Make sure you get at least eight hours of sleep.

2. Lay out your clothing the night before so you know what you’re going to wear.

3. Shower the night before so you aren’t in such a rush.

4. Always put your keys in the same place so that you aren’t scrambling to find them in the morning.

5. Put your children’s homework in a designated place.

6. Give yourself enough time to get to your destination.

When it’s my time to die and God comes to collect me I don’t want to be wrapped around your car’s grill, a bloody mess. Call me crazy, but I don’t like pain.

Wake the hell up in the morning. Stop running on zombie mode. I don’t care if you have to drink a vat of coffee or use Fred Flinstone toothpicks on your lids. Punch yourself in the face, whatever it takes.

Why is it that I seem to be able to get to work on time but you can’t? Do you have to be so obnoxious behind the wheel? Have a little respect. We might be protecting your child or grandchild.

This has been a public service announcement.

Monday Nov 29th

Posted: November 29, 2010 by Marya in Quote of the day
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“Everybody deserves to be forgiven. Do not see somebody for what they do, but for who they are.”

Protected: A pic

Posted: November 28, 2010 by Marya in The Smokers Lounge

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You can take writing away from the girl, but you can never take the writer out of the girl.

A Winnipeg man at the Canadian/US boarder got fined for trying to bring across an Iguana under his hat this weekend.

I would have just put it in the trunk of my car and if they found it, scream at the top of my lungs and point. “EWWWW, how did that get in there? Keep it away from me!” You gotta be a bit of an actress to get away with owt, you know.

Can you imagine me working at the boarder? “Hey, is that an Iguana under your hat or are you just glad to see me?”

It seems that reptile under hat fashion isn’t the only new trend.

Grey is the new blonde. Um…what? It has sex appeal?

That’s right folks. It seems Lady Gaga dyed her hair grey and now many other celebrities are following suit. Kristen McMenamy, even Kelly Osbourne bares a new silver/lavender sheen.

I’m sorry to burst Lady Gaga’s bubble but grey hair was a new wave trend in the eighties. It’s been done. I had a few ultra modern friends who dyed their hair that colour.

She admitted that she used to dye her hair blonde to avoid being mistaken for troubled star, Amy Winehouse. Ha-ha!

Reality is that from the runways of spring and summer shows at Dior and Chanel in Paris, to the hair salons of New York, young women are going grey.

Ya see now, just let your hair go to pot and you’ll be in with the top fashion. Ha-ha. Who needs hundreds of dollars to be with the “in crowd”, anymore. Just let nature take its course.

Do I happen to like that look? No. Older people are always looking for the fountain of youth and now young people are paying good money to look old. Figure that one out.

I actually prefer to combine both looks together.

Sunday Nov 28th 2010

Posted: November 28, 2010 by Marya in Quote of the day
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When you do it right, no-one remembers; when you do it wrong, no-one forgets 😦