Seriously, get out of the Cracker Jack and learn the rules of the road.

When the Crossing Guard has his stop sign out it means stop. Stop you effin’ freaks! It doesn’t mean you step on your gas, go through his stop sign or hit him with your vehicle.

If I am in my vehicle and stop to let somebody cross, it doesn’t mean you zoom around me and hit a child. I’m stopped for a reason. Use your neanderthal-laden brain.

This is how you avoid killing me and others in the morning:

1. Make sure you get at least eight hours of sleep.

2. Lay out your clothing the night before so you know what you’re going to wear.

3. Shower the night before so you aren’t in such a rush.

4. Always put your keys in the same place so that you aren’t scrambling to find them in the morning.

5. Put your children’s homework in a designated place.

6. Give yourself enough time to get to your destination.

When it’s my time to die and God comes to collect me I don’t want to be wrapped around your car’s grill, a bloody mess. Call me crazy, but I don’t like pain.

Wake the hell up in the morning. Stop running on zombie mode. I don’t care if you have to drink a vat of coffee or use Fred Flinstone toothpicks on your lids. Punch yourself in the face, whatever it takes.

Why is it that I seem to be able to get to work on time but you can’t? Do you have to be so obnoxious behind the wheel? Have a little respect. We might be protecting your child or grandchild.

This has been a public service announcement.

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