Posts Tagged ‘crisp’

Why is it that almost every animal on the planet goes into hibernation in the winter, but we don’t? Yes, I think most people are animals. Can you imagine not having to go out into that extremely cold air or snow?

I think employers should be forced to pay two months out of the year for hibernation. Nobody can charge you anything for those two months and so you’d have to adjust your payment schedules accordingly. If you don’t have a job then the government pays to cover your expenses during that period. You can be as lazy as you want and not always be in such a rush. Just wake up every so often and have a snack. Can you imagine it as law?

I think it would be especially fantastic for mothers and wives. “I’m sorry, I can’t be your slave anymore. I’m in hibernation. You want a 7up? It’s in the fridge awaiting your lazy ass. While you’re at it, stick a straw up your big snoz and inhale deeply. It’s crisp and clean and might wake you the hell up from your Utopian fantasy world…and while you’re at it, replace the damn toilet roll.”

You could get really snarky and just blame it on your hibernation period. If you get impatient with dim-wits around you before then, call it PHP. (Pre-Hibernation Period). After all, you’re tired from running after jerks all year. There is always a good way to cover your tracks. It’s what seperates an intellegent woman from the shmucks. Ha-ha!

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